“My hair does WHAT?!” – What they don’t tell you about postpartum life

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I always knew I’d struggle to adjust to life with a newborn – it was a phase that (contrary to what others pushed on me) I knew I wasn’t going to enjoy that much. Don’t get me wrong – I was infinitely happy about how my life was about to change but that whole fourth trimester thing just didn’t appeal. A human so tiny that I was constantly worried I’d drop or pick up the wrong way and snap in half?! I was so protective of my little bear that I was even scared of myself. How many times can you poke a baby in a 24 hour period to make sure they’re still alive?! Turns out – A LOT. So, off the back of this small paragraph intro that probably makes no sense, here goes the list of ‘What they don’t tell you about postpartum life’ – all of this is channelled from my own experiences and EVERYONE’S fourth trimester is entirely different I’m sure:

  1. Regardless of how you delivered, you will bleed from your hooha and SOMEWHERE will hurt. Begging my Mum to buy me a kids rubber ring to sit on 2 days PP was definitely not my finest hour. I remember lying in the hospital with my catheter and my spinal wearing off thinking ‘hey! this isn’t that bad’ – MAN! I was so wrong. The journey home was horrendous, my Mum tried to meticulously avoid all bumps in the road but even with her extreme care, by the time I got to my front door I genuinely thought my vagina had fallen out. I was permanently in a state of anxiety that I was going to get an infection and constantly attempting to remain as clean as I possibly could. Alongside, the worry that I had a vagina that resembled scar face and asking Andy to check it approx. 17 times a day. (Sorry love!)
  2. In my case, I was happy to formula feed. I knew I wouldn’t have much time off before going back to work and didn’t want to mess with my tiny humans mind by letting him adjust to breastfeeding and then implementing a bottle within a few weeks. I thought naively, that my supply wouldn’t be the best anyway as I had read articles about bustier ladies having trouble with their supply. I (again) was so wrong. I had bazoombas like Pamela Anderson and everytime I bent down they poured milk. They were painful, engorged, I could barely wear a bra never mind breast pads! Rex wouldn’t settle on me easily as he was entirely pissed off that I wouldn’t let him drink from my chest. (Sorry buddy!)
  3. Night sweats. I don’t even think I have to explain for all you Mamas out there. I would wake up in the night to feed my new little human and I would be absolutely DRENCHED in sweat – I’d have to grab a towel and dry myself off before even attempting to do anything because the minute I got out of my warm bed I’d be absolutely freezing – it was basically as if I had just emerged from a swimming pool. This continued for at least 6 weeks and I was genuinely begging for it to end. I’d be freezing in bed drenched in sweat and I couldn’t keep up with it as hard as I tried. Apparently it’s the pregnancy hormones being drained out of you – then how do you explain my next point…
  4. Crying. Emotional wreck. I’ve had jokes made many times by my friends that I am the ice queen – heart of stone and “none of us have ever seen you cry” – well sweet jesus that took a dive when I had Rex. Anything, everything – made me so emotional. Especially if it was concerning my tiny tot.
  5. This last one is happening to me right now and I’m genuinely in awe. I have thick curly hair and THANK GOODNESS FOR THAT because it’s falling out, in clumps, constantly. I can run my hand through my hair and have a huge handful of hair – washing my hair has now turned into a game of ‘can you unblock the plug hole fast enough for the water to drain enough so you don’t drown’ – tad dramatic but y’know, it happens. Screen Shot 2018-09-09 at 17.01.41

I am more than sure a few more will crop up as time goes on but for now, I will leave you with those 5 delightful facts about my postpartum life. OH! And a picture of Rex for good measure of course!

N x


“It says you’re pregnant!”

Well… it’s been 71 days since I found out that I’m expecting my little ‘June bug’ and it has been a W H I R L W I N D.

First of all, while maybe the timing is a little off, this baby is so incredibly wanted and loved already. When we found out we were pregnant, (whilst I actually still don’t believe it) we were absolutely elated and adding a little mini-us to our team of weirdos is the best news.

Right, stop rambling, queue the actual *finding out* story:

My body is insane, TMI – my periods are so sporadic, it’s impossible to track anything and a few days late for me is NOTHING. However, on this occasion, I was two days late and just felt ‘weird.’ There is genuinely no other word for it and I remember lying in bed on said night and thinking ‘I’m pregnant.’

The next morning I woke up and thought it was just late night craziness, I couldn’t be pregnant – just forget about it. However, whilst out at lunch I decided that I would pick up a pregnancy test “just in case” – I was at work all day and was short staffed (my fault as I run my own business!) so I was running around like a crazy b*tch. I peed on the stick, put it back in it’s little packet and placed it in my bag, continued with work and completely forgot about it!!! (SO many people have asked how I could have possibly just forgotten about it, but honestly, I did)

Jump forwards an hour and a half, my restaurant is fully set and I have a minute of reflection – umm I should probably check the pee stick, right?! Well, there’s no mistaking this little gem, is there?!


*Queue the frantic phone call to my Mother*

‘You will NEVER guess what?!’ ‘…you’re pregnant’


We decided we would take a couple more tests together just to be sure – sitting in my house, waiting for the bloody egg timer to do it’s thing (I did not realise how long 3 minutes can be when it’s something as big as whether you are going to grow a human inside your body). My Mother decided she would video the egg timer’s impending result and was absolutely flabbergasted when she missed it (because of her heels being so loud that we didn’t hear the beep of the PT alarm) that she forgot to actually tell me what the result was?!?! “It says you’re PREGNAAAAAAAAAAANT!”

Three tests later and it was confirmed, Clearblue told me very efficiently that I was ‘Pregnant 1-2’ – it’s honestly amazing how your body just knows that something is out of the norm.

Honestly, this might be the most boring blog post some of you have EVER read but for me, this is about documenting all of these moments before a newborn comes and blows them all out of my head with their cuteness and perpetual crying.

Thank you for reading, guys. As I’ve said, the last 71 days have been a whirlwind and more blog posts will definitely follow including some week by week pregnancy updates, what they DO NOT TELL YOU about being pregnant and a few cute little scan pictures for good measure because this is an incredible experience (despite the throwing up!)

Nadine ♥